How can I be so loved

and feel so lonely –

how is it

these micro-moments build

causing me to break

where the silent screams,


are back,

tears are streaming down my face,

my sinuses are blocked,

I can barely breathe,

my body nearly cannot support itself,



eyes blurred from crying,

forgetting to breathe,

wondering how

when being in a good place

I want something to be done

to alleviate this misery

I know how much progress I’ve made,

but when the tears stream,

being brushed back into my hair,

my body shakes,

my breath is held,

and the uncontrollable,

incomprehensible pain flows

I feel as though I am back where I was

5 years ago


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